Chemo again yesterday. I need to drink more water, for sure, but otherwise, this week is better than my last treatment.
After the prayer service last week, it felt like I was magically transported from shaky ground, over a huge crevice in the earth, and then placed onto solid ground. It was a huge shift that you all made for me, so I know that helped make this better.
On Monday, I did a one-day trip to North Bennington, Vermont (3.5 hours each way in the pouring rain) to see this Vietnamese doctor. I wondered if I was crazy, desperate, doing a pilgrimage....in any case, off I went. I met with him, and by taking my pulse and looking at my tongue (I love the non-invasive approach of Chinese medicine!), he determined that my liver, spleen and heart were weak, and suggested that I cut back on the chemo if possible, to give them a chance to strengthen. I've been having lots of chest pains since I started chemo (and I had these when I did chemo two years ago), so it made sense to me. And he gave me a huge bag of Chinese teas for me to make (and drink) on my off-chemo weeks.
On Tuesday, I got to my appointment and, instead of seeing the doctor, I got her nurse. I had never worked with or even met or heard of her nurse before, not once in the three years I've been going there. And, one of the things that makes this bearable is having folks who know me and know my history. This change didn't feel good.
But, I was very wrong. She was great. I got to talk with her about all my yukky side effects from last time, she suggested a 20% lower dose of all the chemos. a new drug regimen for the days following my chemo to help with the nausea. I still hate taking pills, but she and others convinced me to give these a go.
When I got to the infusion room and saw my chemo nurse, she asked me how my appointment went. Apparently, they all discussed how I would handle seeing the nurse instead of the doctor, and weren't sure it would fly. I guess they know me well.
Chemo, other than the drugs, was like a little party -- thank you to everyone who was there!
Again, I wear the chemo pump for two days, and that in itself makes me feel yukky. Plus it has an odor about it. But I also recognize that alot of this is attitude and mine seems to be shifting a bit.
OH, then this morning, I was going to cranial sacral therapy at 10:00. At 9:30, my sorry butt was still in bed. Showering is a huge hassle with this pump hanging off my chest, but I didn't want anyone to do any kind of body work on me without showering! So, I was going to be late. I'll call her. Computer crashed, so can't look up her number. Ugh. Got to the car. Battery dead. I switched to Tiron's car, and finally got there with 10 minutes left in my appointment!
So, life is challenging, but the appointment was across the street from a chocolate store, and I got to get the kids their "Nut Free Easter bunnies" and other treats, so that is big plus. I am so conflicted about them eating sugar.....
Thank you for your support and caring. It's all coming right back to you.
Love, Marie
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